If ... if I could cook! Of course I can cook I am Russian!"I hugged her tightly (this was such an easy problem to fix I could not believe it) and replied with a simple question, "Tatiana, while Ben might speak Russian exceptionally well is Ben a Russian man?"She pulled back from me, looked at me and answered, "No Masha, you know as well as I do he is from America and I am very thankful for that."I continued with my interrogation (hoping she would soon answer her own question), "So tell me Tatiana, what have we been taught about American women and cooking?"I watched her think for a few moments then she smiled and answered, "Masha, we have been taught that many younger American women have not learned the fine art of cooking."I forced Tatiana to make a decision, "So Tatiana, knowing Ben is an American man should he automatically assume that you can cook?"I was happy to watch her seriously consider my question. She finally replied, "Masha I am ashamed. You are correct and I have just. " Ooh that's nice as well, I think I'll treat myself to some stockings."I squirmed as women looked at me and smiled at my discomfort."Oh Terry, look at this, I've always wanted one of these, and she held up a sheer white baby doll with matching panties." Come on for Christ's sake, or I'm outa here."She pouted and took her purchases to the checkout, as she handed over her purchases the woman behind her said with a laugh."I wish my boyfriend would buy me stuff like that, all he thinks about is beer and more bloody beer."Then turning to me she said."You look after her, she looks like she's been run over by a bloody bus." Oh he does luv, believe me, he does, he's lovely aren't you darling?" and threading her arm through mine she led the way out of the shop before breaking down in tears of laughter."Hahahaha, my boyfriend, she actually thought you were my boyfriend."For some reason, I got quite annoyed at her laughter."Well you could do a lot bloody worse mum, I think I'm an improvement on.
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